reede, oktoober 15, 2004
Wiping Away the Blackness
Today while Evelyn and the kids were at the homeschooling co-op, I finally took care of something that has been bugging me since our house was broken into.
When the police were looking for evidence, they dusted many areas for fingerprints. They used a black powder that looks like copier toner, and it was smeared on several areas that we walk by every day: the drawer to the computer desk, some speakers for the computer, and even my Estonian textbook, "E Nagu Eesti." Every time I would see that blackness, it served as a jarring reminder of what happened, even more than the empty computer desk or the blank space in the basement where the kids' video game systems used to be. So today I finally wiped away the blackness and got rid of the glaring reminder of what happened.
Of course, it is not so easy to wipe away the feelings we have. I definitely lost the least, since what was taken had far more sentimental and practical value for Evelyn and the kids. But we all have had this feeling of blackness in one way or another, although it is starting to diminish slightly. Someone entering your home uninvited, even when you are not there, feels like such a violation. And for all the material things they stole, probably the most significant thing they stole from us was our sense of peace, at least for the short term. Now we think twice before we leave the house, and wonder what we will do the next time we have to go away for a few days. We will figure it out, I'm sure, but it is the blackness that is not easily wiped away.
But we also have hope through it all. We know this could have happened in America just as easily, so it is not like this is a risk of being in Estonia. And we feel surrounded by Estonians who have been a real comfort and help to us. When we arrived home and discovered the break in, the local Baptist pastor, who has become our friend, came to help translate with the police for us. Before he left, he prayed a wonderful prayer of comfort with us, and even prayed for the salvation of those who had broken in. In speaking with another Estonian friend the next day (she came to the police station to help translate for the written report), she said that she and her boyfriend had also prayed for the thieves. Later, still another person told us the same thing. It reminded us that it is for people like the ones who broke into the house (and the ones who did!) that we are here. They need the hope of the gospel to wipe away the blackness in their lives. How can we be discouraged when we think of that?
Although there will always probably be a quiet ache from what happened, we know that God has greater plans, and we trust Him for that. There is no blackness He can't wipe away.
--Tim
When the police were looking for evidence, they dusted many areas for fingerprints. They used a black powder that looks like copier toner, and it was smeared on several areas that we walk by every day: the drawer to the computer desk, some speakers for the computer, and even my Estonian textbook, "E Nagu Eesti." Every time I would see that blackness, it served as a jarring reminder of what happened, even more than the empty computer desk or the blank space in the basement where the kids' video game systems used to be. So today I finally wiped away the blackness and got rid of the glaring reminder of what happened.
Of course, it is not so easy to wipe away the feelings we have. I definitely lost the least, since what was taken had far more sentimental and practical value for Evelyn and the kids. But we all have had this feeling of blackness in one way or another, although it is starting to diminish slightly. Someone entering your home uninvited, even when you are not there, feels like such a violation. And for all the material things they stole, probably the most significant thing they stole from us was our sense of peace, at least for the short term. Now we think twice before we leave the house, and wonder what we will do the next time we have to go away for a few days. We will figure it out, I'm sure, but it is the blackness that is not easily wiped away.
But we also have hope through it all. We know this could have happened in America just as easily, so it is not like this is a risk of being in Estonia. And we feel surrounded by Estonians who have been a real comfort and help to us. When we arrived home and discovered the break in, the local Baptist pastor, who has become our friend, came to help translate with the police for us. Before he left, he prayed a wonderful prayer of comfort with us, and even prayed for the salvation of those who had broken in. In speaking with another Estonian friend the next day (she came to the police station to help translate for the written report), she said that she and her boyfriend had also prayed for the thieves. Later, still another person told us the same thing. It reminded us that it is for people like the ones who broke into the house (and the ones who did!) that we are here. They need the hope of the gospel to wipe away the blackness in their lives. How can we be discouraged when we think of that?
Although there will always probably be a quiet ache from what happened, we know that God has greater plans, and we trust Him for that. There is no blackness He can't wipe away.
--Tim
