teisipäev, veebruar 08, 2005
Tale of the Chipmunk
by Reginald Douglas Mortimer Younger Groff III
A few days back, I was determined to find out and get rid of the little feet we were hearing in our living room ceiling. They were especially raucous when the TV was on at nighttime. Apparently, it must have woken them up and made them hostile, whomever they were.
My daughter begged for their lives and I am softy anyway, so my cousin and I bought some "have a heart" mouse traps thinking it had to be mice since Bobby was told by an expert that chipmunks hibernate all winter (at least if they don't have TV below them). So I started by trying to remove the light fixtures hoping to get up in the ceiling. The first living room light took me 5 minutes to take down only to realize a large metal box blocked any hopes of getting through. It then took me about 30 minutes to get it back up again with very tenuous screw fittings and one bulb that suddenly didn't work. I gave up that night. The next night, we took a different light out of the ceiling. My cousin was able to bend back some metal so that we could not only set the traps but place a video camera and a battery-operated light to see who it was we had for guests.The peanut butter had a strong smell and within 5 minutes, we had a cute little chipmunk jumping all over the place. Only trouble was, it was either too smart for the traps or it didn't fit. We baited the outside with a little peanut butter just to get the critters hooked. As we watched the video, we saw the chipmunk hit the little trap doors so it could no longer get at the peanut butter. Of course it did what any self-respecting nut gatherer would do. One by one it picked up the traps and dragged them away into the darkness of my ceiling to be used as house furniture or as conversation pieces.
The next day my cousin and I went to the big Paris Animal Feed hardware store determined to buy a chipmunk trap that would certainly capture the creature without killing it. For just under $20 we bought the long cage with dual doors and all sorts of springs and levers. We were very proud of ourselves. Of course it didn't fit into the hole all the way. The inner ceiling was too low and our trap too long; we we did what anyone with a too-long trap would do. We stuck it in as far as it would go, braced the bottom end with two boxes on top of our bookcases, fired up the camera, lit up the lights and watched. As chipmunks would approach the strange metal contraption that was smeared with peanut butter, you could tell they were very alert. The first Chippy used its tail and back feet to keep the trap lid open as it stretched out and ate all of the peanut butter inside. Apparently because the trap was tilted down at a 45-degree angle, they weren't willing to just jump in.
On the next attempt we put the peanut butter at the farthest end so that they couldn't just hang in and get the good stuff. Watching the video, we not only saw two chipmunks jumping all over the trap, one actually got shut in as it gorged itself on that brown creamy dessert. When it was done eating it opened the "trap door" and went about its business showing us who were the real mice in this game.
Last night I reset the trap with a feeling of "oh well, at least the hole is being blocked by something." This morning I find the trap dislodged and the cat acting very suspicious. Obviously the cat had made it to top of the bookcase and had the idea of getting up into that hole. At this point, however, we noticed something was behind the toy soldier display case and the cat was going bonkers trying to get at it. There we found a Chippy holding on for dear life. Apparently it had met the cat earlier. I put on some gloves at the urging of my wife who thought I'd surely be bitten and get rabies, and managed to carefully slide the case out so the Chip would drop. I had my daughter, Casey, put the cat in the cellar just as the chipmunk ran behind the nearby bookcase that resided underneath the former light fixture's now-gaping hole.
I went to the garage and found a small butterfly net and asked my wife, Bea, and daughter, Casey, to guard it from running to the entertainment center. Fortunately the carpet had just been washed so most of the furniture was still in the kitchen. I had them open the hall door and the outside door. I went to the tightest side of the bookcase and began thrashing with the net until the Chippy finally gave run. Bea and Casey stood their ground screaming a high-pierced scream like no other banshee could make. I am sure the heart of that chipmunk nearly exploded as it ran for the door. Instead of going through it properly, the most direct line was the crack between the wall and hinge. It had some difficulty but I can still recall its little butt all bunged up until it finally squeezed through and then ran out into the snow. As the girls laughed tears of relief, I imagined that the Chip made a B-line for the same hole in my house it found to begin with. It's probably plotting my demise as I type from some high warm perch even now.
Reggie with Ivana Trump
Reggie shooting an ad
Reggie cleanshaven
Reggie on location
Reggie, Beate & Cassandra were our generous hosts when we recently visited America for 4 weeks. We are eternally grateful for them opening their home and their lives to us! Christopher is well-acquainted with the nightly antics of these chipmunks, as he could hear them running around half the night under the floor where he was sleeping!
A few days back, I was determined to find out and get rid of the little feet we were hearing in our living room ceiling. They were especially raucous when the TV was on at nighttime. Apparently, it must have woken them up and made them hostile, whomever they were.
My daughter begged for their lives and I am softy anyway, so my cousin and I bought some "have a heart" mouse traps thinking it had to be mice since Bobby was told by an expert that chipmunks hibernate all winter (at least if they don't have TV below them). So I started by trying to remove the light fixtures hoping to get up in the ceiling. The first living room light took me 5 minutes to take down only to realize a large metal box blocked any hopes of getting through. It then took me about 30 minutes to get it back up again with very tenuous screw fittings and one bulb that suddenly didn't work. I gave up that night. The next night, we took a different light out of the ceiling. My cousin was able to bend back some metal so that we could not only set the traps but place a video camera and a battery-operated light to see who it was we had for guests.The peanut butter had a strong smell and within 5 minutes, we had a cute little chipmunk jumping all over the place. Only trouble was, it was either too smart for the traps or it didn't fit. We baited the outside with a little peanut butter just to get the critters hooked. As we watched the video, we saw the chipmunk hit the little trap doors so it could no longer get at the peanut butter. Of course it did what any self-respecting nut gatherer would do. One by one it picked up the traps and dragged them away into the darkness of my ceiling to be used as house furniture or as conversation pieces.
The next day my cousin and I went to the big Paris Animal Feed hardware store determined to buy a chipmunk trap that would certainly capture the creature without killing it. For just under $20 we bought the long cage with dual doors and all sorts of springs and levers. We were very proud of ourselves. Of course it didn't fit into the hole all the way. The inner ceiling was too low and our trap too long; we we did what anyone with a too-long trap would do. We stuck it in as far as it would go, braced the bottom end with two boxes on top of our bookcases, fired up the camera, lit up the lights and watched. As chipmunks would approach the strange metal contraption that was smeared with peanut butter, you could tell they were very alert. The first Chippy used its tail and back feet to keep the trap lid open as it stretched out and ate all of the peanut butter inside. Apparently because the trap was tilted down at a 45-degree angle, they weren't willing to just jump in.
On the next attempt we put the peanut butter at the farthest end so that they couldn't just hang in and get the good stuff. Watching the video, we not only saw two chipmunks jumping all over the trap, one actually got shut in as it gorged itself on that brown creamy dessert. When it was done eating it opened the "trap door" and went about its business showing us who were the real mice in this game.
Last night I reset the trap with a feeling of "oh well, at least the hole is being blocked by something." This morning I find the trap dislodged and the cat acting very suspicious. Obviously the cat had made it to top of the bookcase and had the idea of getting up into that hole. At this point, however, we noticed something was behind the toy soldier display case and the cat was going bonkers trying to get at it. There we found a Chippy holding on for dear life. Apparently it had met the cat earlier. I put on some gloves at the urging of my wife who thought I'd surely be bitten and get rabies, and managed to carefully slide the case out so the Chip would drop. I had my daughter, Casey, put the cat in the cellar just as the chipmunk ran behind the nearby bookcase that resided underneath the former light fixture's now-gaping hole.
I went to the garage and found a small butterfly net and asked my wife, Bea, and daughter, Casey, to guard it from running to the entertainment center. Fortunately the carpet had just been washed so most of the furniture was still in the kitchen. I had them open the hall door and the outside door. I went to the tightest side of the bookcase and began thrashing with the net until the Chippy finally gave run. Bea and Casey stood their ground screaming a high-pierced scream like no other banshee could make. I am sure the heart of that chipmunk nearly exploded as it ran for the door. Instead of going through it properly, the most direct line was the crack between the wall and hinge. It had some difficulty but I can still recall its little butt all bunged up until it finally squeezed through and then ran out into the snow. As the girls laughed tears of relief, I imagined that the Chip made a B-line for the same hole in my house it found to begin with. It's probably plotting my demise as I type from some high warm perch even now.
Reggie with Ivana Trump
Reggie shooting an ad
Reggie cleanshaven
Reggie on location
Reggie, Beate & Cassandra were our generous hosts when we recently visited America for 4 weeks. We are eternally grateful for them opening their home and their lives to us! Christopher is well-acquainted with the nightly antics of these chipmunks, as he could hear them running around half the night under the floor where he was sleeping!
